I don't understand Thanksgiving.
It's kind of like "Okay kids, let's celebrate how the Native Americans all got smallpox because the Pilgrims gave them infected blankets (or something of that nature), and then they all decided to teach each other how to fish and grow corn, by devouring this harmless turkey that could be frolicking through the woods with its turkey friends, but instead is on our dinner table! Oh, and then we'll force you to learn and relearn about the pilgrims and make you stare at pictures of a rock that's NOT GOING ANYWHERE! Isn't this swell?!"
Yes. That's what Thanksgiving is to me. Now, I'm no History buff, but I have a feeling the Native Americans weren't too happy with the fact that a bunch of people from another country just like popped into their homes, gave them diseases that they hadn't had to worry about before, and then asked them how to survive. But hey, they managed to get a three day party out of it. Whoopee.
Things That Confuse or Frighten Me About Thanksgiving:
1. Why do we celebrate by eating untill we all end up in a turkey coma? And also, why are there no holidays for vegetarians? Thanksgiving, you focus around the turkey. Christmas and Easter are ham. Where's National Veggie Burger Appreciation Day? I demand answers.
2. Roanoke freaks me out beyond belief. The fact that an entire colony of people are just GONE?! DUDE! What happened? Cannibolistic angry Native Americans? Rabid squirrels? Either way, I'm pretty scared.
3. Why do we celebrate by eating? It seems like more of a drag to me. You have to get all dressed up and clean and make a huge amount of food so that you can sit there and eat and then it's over. Seriously? That's all? No presents? No egg hunt? LAME.
4. That feeling when everyone's done eating SUCKS. It's like you're all just sitting there, and you've finished eating in like fifteen minutes, and you look around and laugh nervously. . . It's just garbage. End of story.
I guess what I'm trying to say, is that this holiday kind of bites. Bring on the Black Friday (As if I can actually go out.)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
i agree.... what is so terrific about eating until you cant eat anymore and having a stomach ache. and now ive eaten turkey two nights in a row and guess what? im eating it again tonight. wooo! although the concept is good. but people overlook it often times, and just think about the food.
Post a Comment