(Note: This title is a pathetic attempt at being funny and clever. Try to ignore it).
I haven't posted in a while. I've just had nothing to post about. . . And I've been a little busy blog-wise, becoming acquainted with my three other blogs. . . It's a problem.
I have nothing really to post. I'm just going to stop now.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Monday, February 2, 2009
To E and N. Clarifications.
Now that I'm calm, I would like to say that I'm not mad at anyone, especially the one of you who reads this blog. Referred to as E. You both, and K as well, have been amazing friends to me this year. I was just upset.
Shut Up And Let Me Go.
Current Mood: Angry. No, rather furious.
This is just ridiculous. I'm too angry to put any effort into attempting to sound eloquent and intelligent today. I honestly don't know where to start, but then again I don't even know when this whole thing started. I've been friends with one of my closest friends, let's call her N, for a long time, since around the end of sixth grade. So where on EARTH do people get off basically thinking that I have to go through *them* to get to my good friend, no one of my *best* friends? I honestly don't understand when the girls who say mean, downright rude things to you get to practically run your life. Honestly, I'm curious. If you're reading this, and you know who you are, why is it that I can't hang out with my friend on Friday nights? Because it would piss you off? Or because you "called dibs" or something sick like that when you made fun of her and played it off as a joke?
It sickens me to hear what you say about her to her face. That is a TWISTED friendship. So yes, I hope you make a comment in front of me. Don't consider this a threat, a fight instigation, or in any way a mean message. It's a reality check. You're mean to her, and then proceed to get mad if I want to spend a Friday night with her.
This is just ridiculous. I'm too angry to put any effort into attempting to sound eloquent and intelligent today. I honestly don't know where to start, but then again I don't even know when this whole thing started. I've been friends with one of my closest friends, let's call her N, for a long time, since around the end of sixth grade. So where on EARTH do people get off basically thinking that I have to go through *them* to get to my good friend, no one of my *best* friends? I honestly don't understand when the girls who say mean, downright rude things to you get to practically run your life. Honestly, I'm curious. If you're reading this, and you know who you are, why is it that I can't hang out with my friend on Friday nights? Because it would piss you off? Or because you "called dibs" or something sick like that when you made fun of her and played it off as a joke?
It sickens me to hear what you say about her to her face. That is a TWISTED friendship. So yes, I hope you make a comment in front of me. Don't consider this a threat, a fight instigation, or in any way a mean message. It's a reality check. You're mean to her, and then proceed to get mad if I want to spend a Friday night with her.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
I Need A Fix Cause I'm Going Down
Current State: Rather uncomfortable despite the fact that I'm in the ugliest sweats I own.
Current Song: Dear Prudence, Across The Universe Version.
Current Mood: In a mood. That's about all there is.
I'm in a mood.
In case you hadn't previously figured that.
I'm in one of those combat boot, stomp in a mud puddle, crush flowers, hating the world, black eyeliner, warpaint, scoweling mood. I'm not positive what has put me into this mood. I think it may be the people I'm forced to be around, living in Connecticut. You know. THOSE girls. The ones like I used to be. Let me profile them for you. I was not one of THESE girls through and through, but I had most of the characteristics. You can guess which parts were not me, because I'm a good kid.
THOSE girls:
THOSE girls are the girls with the blonde hair with hair products that soaked into their brains, making them think that londe meant dumb. They wear strictly Abercrombie and Fitch and Hollister, and Old Navy is practically a dirty word, usually accompianied by a crinkle of their ski slope noses. They claim to love rap, rock, or some other form of "hardcore" music. These are the girls who have a large circle of friends who all hate each other, but know they look good together, and therefore continue to hang out. They're completely boy crazy, using the terms "Like" "Hot" and "OMIGAWD!" every other sentence. They chew gum loudly, as though it's some kind of mating call to the opposite sex*. They belch and do not excuse themselves, and often have terrible manners*. They speak as though it is rather glamerous to have a New York accent, "Nawt" and "Gawd"-ing everything they say. They're often doing things way before their time*. They gossip ferociously, and are convinced they can "take" anyone who gets in their way of what they want. These are the girls who, at twelve, thought they were the epitome of cool sneaking into a PG-13 movie. These are the girls you see at the mall shrieking with all of their friends, and you resist the urge to punch each of them in the face.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about THOSE girls. Specifically, myself when I was one of THOSE girls. What had I been thinking? Why did I change? My only answer to these questions is I don't know. But thank goodness I did.
*Most obviously things I never did.
Current Song: Dear Prudence, Across The Universe Version.
Current Mood: In a mood. That's about all there is.
I'm in a mood.
In case you hadn't previously figured that.
I'm in one of those combat boot, stomp in a mud puddle, crush flowers, hating the world, black eyeliner, warpaint, scoweling mood. I'm not positive what has put me into this mood. I think it may be the people I'm forced to be around, living in Connecticut. You know. THOSE girls. The ones like I used to be. Let me profile them for you. I was not one of THESE girls through and through, but I had most of the characteristics. You can guess which parts were not me, because I'm a good kid.
THOSE girls:
THOSE girls are the girls with the blonde hair with hair products that soaked into their brains, making them think that londe meant dumb. They wear strictly Abercrombie and Fitch and Hollister, and Old Navy is practically a dirty word, usually accompianied by a crinkle of their ski slope noses. They claim to love rap, rock, or some other form of "hardcore" music. These are the girls who have a large circle of friends who all hate each other, but know they look good together, and therefore continue to hang out. They're completely boy crazy, using the terms "Like" "Hot" and "OMIGAWD!" every other sentence. They chew gum loudly, as though it's some kind of mating call to the opposite sex*. They belch and do not excuse themselves, and often have terrible manners*. They speak as though it is rather glamerous to have a New York accent, "Nawt" and "Gawd"-ing everything they say. They're often doing things way before their time*. They gossip ferociously, and are convinced they can "take" anyone who gets in their way of what they want. These are the girls who, at twelve, thought they were the epitome of cool sneaking into a PG-13 movie. These are the girls you see at the mall shrieking with all of their friends, and you resist the urge to punch each of them in the face.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about THOSE girls. Specifically, myself when I was one of THOSE girls. What had I been thinking? Why did I change? My only answer to these questions is I don't know. But thank goodness I did.
*Most obviously things I never did.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
You Electrify My Life
I suppose I should give updates on what's occurred in my life for the past week. (Hah, I say that as though something interesting has happened.)
Monday was school, the day that I became incredibly sick. When I went home, it turned out that I had a one hundred and two fever. After sleeping on and off, I ended up being up half the night with another fever. Mom stayed up with me applying various ice packs to my head. Tuesday I was home sick, too ill to take my English Midterm. I only missed two hours of testing anyway. We had a well deserved snow day Wednesday, and a delay Thursday, in which I went to school for four hours and took two midterms. Friday brought a Biology midterm that I'm rather unsure about. I don't understand Science at all. I can't tell you much from my last three years of Science classes. Friday night, Jess, Steph and I saw The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. It was possibly one of the saddest movies I've ever seen. Today was more of nothing. I got sick (literally), but after that I was fine. Well enough to do my Single Ladies Dance over and over. That song will never get old for me.
Here I am again, Saturday night. This is actually one weekend where I didn't have much planned. I've been spending a lot of time with Jess and Steph. I kind of like it.
Tomorrow is Superbowl Sunday. I do not follow football, but my cousin Jess is coming over with her family, which should be fun if I hide my guitar. I love my guitar, but unfortunately, so does everyone else. I don't really appreciate people touching my Edward Anthony Masen Cullen.
Oh! Speaking of Edward, I've been to two guitar lessons! I've learned the E, A, and D chords, along with some finger exercises and I've done a little note reading. I love it so much. Every time a new little callus pops up on my fingers, I feel like Kim Possible. It's really not a big deal.
Nothing else has really occurred. I'm not too interesting
Monday was school, the day that I became incredibly sick. When I went home, it turned out that I had a one hundred and two fever. After sleeping on and off, I ended up being up half the night with another fever. Mom stayed up with me applying various ice packs to my head. Tuesday I was home sick, too ill to take my English Midterm. I only missed two hours of testing anyway. We had a well deserved snow day Wednesday, and a delay Thursday, in which I went to school for four hours and took two midterms. Friday brought a Biology midterm that I'm rather unsure about. I don't understand Science at all. I can't tell you much from my last three years of Science classes. Friday night, Jess, Steph and I saw The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. It was possibly one of the saddest movies I've ever seen. Today was more of nothing. I got sick (literally), but after that I was fine. Well enough to do my Single Ladies Dance over and over. That song will never get old for me.
Here I am again, Saturday night. This is actually one weekend where I didn't have much planned. I've been spending a lot of time with Jess and Steph. I kind of like it.
Tomorrow is Superbowl Sunday. I do not follow football, but my cousin Jess is coming over with her family, which should be fun if I hide my guitar. I love my guitar, but unfortunately, so does everyone else. I don't really appreciate people touching my Edward Anthony Masen Cullen.
Oh! Speaking of Edward, I've been to two guitar lessons! I've learned the E, A, and D chords, along with some finger exercises and I've done a little note reading. I love it so much. Every time a new little callus pops up on my fingers, I feel like Kim Possible. It's really not a big deal.
Nothing else has really occurred. I'm not too interesting
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
We, Too, Could Be Glorious.
To One,
Even when I try to be supportive, or attempt to be a good friend, I am wrong. However, if I'm clearly always at fault (You never said anything about that, by the way), why do you continue to stay my friend. You know exactly how to make me feel worth nothing. I'm a little tired of continually being put down (Unintentionally or intentionally as it may be), stepped on, kicked in the face, and blamed. I work so hard for you. I'll never forget the time you told me that a friendship should be effortless. If that is true, what do we have? An apprenticeship? Am I supposed to work my way up into friendship? Because if a friendship is supposed to require no work, I put in an awful lot.
To Another,
I beg for you to notice me. For the moment, this is all I ask for.
Thank you for being you.
Even when I try to be supportive, or attempt to be a good friend, I am wrong. However, if I'm clearly always at fault (You never said anything about that, by the way), why do you continue to stay my friend. You know exactly how to make me feel worth nothing. I'm a little tired of continually being put down (Unintentionally or intentionally as it may be), stepped on, kicked in the face, and blamed. I work so hard for you. I'll never forget the time you told me that a friendship should be effortless. If that is true, what do we have? An apprenticeship? Am I supposed to work my way up into friendship? Because if a friendship is supposed to require no work, I put in an awful lot.
To Another,
I beg for you to notice me. For the moment, this is all I ask for.
Thank you for being you.
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